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Flipside
Volume 48
Issue 15
Flipside
TUTORIAL TIME! Have you ever wondered how to design an effective resumé?
Man Daginot
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5500 Wabash Ave.
Terre Haute, IN, 47803
Objective Money, Wemen, Power
Education Bachelor
Minor in Miedeval Weaponry
bRose Hulman Institute of Technology
GPA: Yes
Skills
• Computer: Python, Java, C, C#, C++, VISUALBASIC, MATLAB; - I rewrote Portal, Assassins Creed, and Halo in each language
• Languages: Swahili, Russian, French, Brail, Arabic, Gaelic, Navajo
• Martial Arts: Karate, Kung Fu, Jujutsu, T’ai chi ch’uan
• Instruments: Harp, Banjo, Triangle, Marimba, Cow Bell
• Deemed the Titanic “Sinkable”
• Added 50 years to the Mayan Calandar (You’re welcome)
Experience
Inventor
• Craft Macaroni and Cheese
• The Printing Press
• The Death Star
• Ferd Fteenthousand
• The iPadd
• Fire... Just call me Prometheus
Lion Tamer
• Spent twelve years in African Safari taming the great wild felines
• Experience in exerting my alpha-male authority over others
CEO
Awards/Activities
LOL Tournament Champion
WWE World Champion
Heisman Trophy Winner
Pokémon Master: Defeated Elite Four in multiple combat scenarios
Pulitzer Prize: Autobiography; “The Life of Man”
Nobel Peace Prize: Extraodinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between people
Oscar: Best Actor in a Leading Role; Rango Unchained
Renamed Pluto as an official planet
Knighted by Queen Elizabeth
Gold Medal: Summer 2008 Olympics; Sand Volleyball
Purple Heart: Lost left leg in Vietnam
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